I’ve always had a type A personality, even as a little girl. I liked being the best, being on top of things 100% of the time, and being in complete control. Growing up, this manifested as perfect grades. I slaved over homework in order to have the perfect report card. I was perfectionistic in other ways too. I never wanted to compete in sports because I knew I couldn’t win. If I was bad at sports, why bother trying? I avoided anything I knew I couldn’t completely succeed in. Continue reading “What are you waiting for?”
In my current period of waiting and transition, I’ve been wondering about what is next for me. What does the future hold? What will life look like in a month, three months, six?
I’m a planner. I always have been. I like to be in control of my life, certain of what is to come. I guess that’s why life is so uncomfortable right now. I believe God has a plan for me, but I don’t know what it is. And lately, I’ve been telling God just what I want his plan to be. I’d like things to work out perfectly: 1, 2, and 3. I know best. Continue reading “Plans”
Living with bipolar disorder can feel like walking on a balance beam. (And, bipolar or not, I’ve never been a very good gymnast.)
Today, I feel like I’m starting to wobble to one side.
Depression can be chemical. Depression can be situational. Depression can be both. But for me? Today? I think it has to do with the situation more than anything. Continue reading “Waiting”